How I'm Ending The Violation Of My Social Media Inboxes In 2023Jan 26, 2023
2022 was a weird year on Social Media. I, like many entrepreneurs, view my social media as a way to connect with my audience, nurture them with free content and, of course, invite them to purchase my offers.
Through my Instagram stories, my friends and clients get a behind-the-scenes view of what I get up to, not just in my business but also travel, how I spend my time etc.
It's great on the one hand because I love receiving messages with recommendations when I'm traveling somewhere new or opinions when I'm on the fence about a purchase. Best of all, it gives me that sense of community, even though I work alone from home most of the time.
What I don't appreciate, though, and my clients and colleagues noticed a dramatic increase in this, too, is what I consider to be the violation of my DMs.
Perhaps you've experienced this too-the SO overdone, insincere cold pitches that usually go something along the lines of:
The Assumptions Sales Pitch:
'Hey Girl/Mompreneur/ Queen/Badass (enter whatever word is the trending word that week)
Love your content! So, what are your goals for your business?
Which (if you're polite and actually reply) very quickly turns into the dreaded sales pitch in which someone you don't know, like, or trust is making assumptions about you or your services and trying to sell you something that you probably don't even need or have zero interest in.
The insulting sales pitch:
Your content needs work. Let me help you. Here's a link to my packages.
The I can't be bothered to say hi first:
Literally just a link with zero greeting, information, or the basic decency to ask if they can send you a link.
Now, when I first started in the online space and was quite naive, I would reply and nicely say thanks but no thanks- which unfortunately only seemed to encourage them with intensified messages of Why not? You're only saying that because you're scared of investing/ have a bad money mindset or, my personal favourite, obviously aren't cut out for business!?
The bane of my existence- the creeps who slide into the DMs and try to use them as a hook-up app. I make it very obvious online that I'm happily married; this doesn't seem to deter them though, as the 'Hey Baby' Hey Beautiful, Hey Sexy copy and paste messages are a dime a dozen. Predominantly from cheesy profiles with almost no followers and pictures of roses, dogs, sunsets or gym selfies.
I'll share my secret of getting men who send me unsolicited photos of their junk to block or delete me.
Warning: It's not for the faint-hearted, but it works like a bomb and results in the digital trash taking itself out.
One day, I was minding my own business and checking my inboxes when there were not one but five unsolicited d!ck pics from someone I didn't know and definitely didn't want pics from. I don't know about you, but I consider this a violation of my personal space.
If you think I'm being overly dramatic, my question is, "would you still think so, if I was sitting on a park bench and someone walked up to me and just whipped their junk out?"
Because the premise is exactly the same: a stranger intentionally decided to try to shock, scare, intimidate, or sexually engage me without my consent.
Women are just so used to being treated like this that we think it's "not a big deal" and either ignore it or pretend it never happened.
Well, Mr Exhibitionist was in for an unpleasant surprise, as he caught me on a day when I wasn't in the mood for his shit or (patriarchy in general), so I decided to give him a taste of his own medicine and got myself some d!ck pics of my own (thanks internet) but first prize ones, huge examples with intimidating girth and replied with no words, just the photos.
ROFL, in 0,5 seconds after receiving my delivery, HE blocked me!
Wonderful! As I said, it's like the trash taking itself out. While unconventional, it works and gives me back the feeling that my inbox is a safe space again.
The cold sales pitches I either ignore, delete or block and I can tell you, it gives me great peace of mind enforcing my digital boundaries and I intend to do this the entire year!
How will you take back control of your digital space in 2023?
Janine Wirth is the proud founder of Path to Healing Therapy and Coaching. Her mission is to help female entrepreneurs heal their emotional baggage, heal unresolved emotional trauma and PTSD without spending years in therapy and create spectacular business success for themselves. You may have read her story in The Spotlight and if so you’ll know why she’s so passionate about her work so when she got the opportunity to work alongside The Female CEO and provide a monthly question and answer she was thrilled!
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