Ask Janine - Should I skip tradition this Christmas?Nov 04, 2021
By Janine Wirth.
I recently lost both my parents, so I'm experiencing a lot of mixed feelings with the holidays approaching. I feel really sad that this will be our first Christmas without them and want to know if I should rather skip our family traditions, as I'm afraid this might really upset my children and I don't them to suffer unnecessarily. What do you think?
I'm very sorry for your loss. It's completely normal to have mixed emotions, especially with it being so recent and while you're actively grieving.
At the end of the day you have to decide what feels good to you and your family, however here is how I view family traditions.
To me, the whole point of having family traditions is not only to give our children a sense of identity and belonging, but it's also a way to celebrate the memory of family members who have passed on. In the beginning this might feel sad, but as the years gone on, it will bring joy and allow you all to cherish those special memories together.
Tradition is the thread that weaves your family story and unites generations going forward.
My suggestion is that you keep the traditions you love and eventually even add some new ones that your children will one day pass onto their children to honour you and your memory. You can still foster those feelings of joy and love, even if you parents aren't physically present.
Examples of ways you can help your children keep the memory of your parents' alive is by baking their favourite cookies or desserts, continue playing the same games and if you celebrate with a tree, getting ornaments with their names or ornaments of their favourite things to honour their grandparents.
It might get emotional, especially the first time, but instead of avoiding this, see it as a wonderful opportunity to teach your children how to process grief in a healthy way which is something that will serve them their entire lives.
I hope this helps you.
Wishing you and your family a wonderful festive season filled with love and warm memories.
Janine Wirth, is the proud founder of Path to Healing Therapy and Coaching. Her mission is to help female entrepreneurs heal their emotional baggage, heal unresolved emotional trauma and PTSD without spending years in therapy and create spectacular business success for themselves. You may have read her story in The Spotlight and if so you’ll know why she’s so passionate about her work so when she got the opportunity to work alongside The Female CEO and provide a monthly question and answer she was thrilled!
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